Growing Through the Generations: From Soap to Understanding
From the early 1900s through much of the 20th century, many parents believed that discipline meant shaping their children with strong, often strict, boundaries. One common punishment, especially for saying “bad words,” was washing a child’s mouth out with soap. It was seen as a way to teach respect, restraint, and moral conduct.
Today, we view that act differently. We’ve come to understand that while words can be powerful, punishing with physical discomfort doesn’t necessarily build the lesson we hoped to teach.
It’s important to look at those past actions with both honesty and compassion. For the parents who used those methods—it doesn’t mean you were cruel or unloving. It means you were parenting with the tools and knowledge you had at the time. If it weighs on your heart now, there’s nothing wrong with offering a sincere apology. Acknowledge it. Explain your intentions. Let your child—or your now-grown adult—know that it wasn’t meant to hurt, but to teach. Then hug them. Show them that you’re still growing too.
Growth doesn’t come from blame. Pointing fingers at the past doesn’t heal the present. But taking responsibility, offering love, and recognizing where we went wrong? That’s how healing begins.
Family isn’t about getting everything right. In fact, it’s often where we get it the most wrong—and still choose to stay, love, and grow. And that, in itself, is a hell of a teacher.
Discover more from Cave News Times
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.
Discussion about this post